Author: Matthew

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Awesome Daily – X-Men, JJ Abrams and Jurassic Park – 27th Jan 2012

### Kitty Pryde, Iceman and Rogue all back for X-Men: Days of Future Past

Bryan Singer announced Saturday via the twitters that Ellen Page, Shawn Ashmore and Anna Paquin will all be returning to the franchise in the upcoming X-Men: Days of Future Past film:

This is going to be interesting. Days of Future Past is a crazy time travel story which is how we have the _First Class_ cast and the _X1_, _X2_ and _Last Stand_ casts all together. I’m looking forward to seeing how they tie the 60s versions of the characters together with the present versions of the characters if only because of the few very subtle things that made me consider them to be different time lines. – _Matt_

### Star Trek fan talks about JJ Abrams taking the job directing Star Wars

Jordan Hoffman at Badass Digest:

> Know this: I love Star Wars. Star Trek is a key
> part of my life, but the other, lesser franchise
> is still a great deal of fun. You wanna grab beers
> and yap about IG-88 or Midi-chlorian counts or the
> lesser known works of the Mon Calamari Ballet
> Company? I’m down. But the thing is that Star Wars,
> at least for people in my age group, was something
> that was accepted – it was never not cool. Star Trek
> only became cool very, very recently. And J.J. Abrams,
> for better or worse, had something to do with that.
>
> The basic gist, as Mashable quoted me, is this: I feel
> like J.J. Abrams took me out to the prom but left
> with the hotter girl.

The whole thing is definitely worth a read. He’s more upset than I am, but it does mirror my feelings on the situation pretty well.

[[link](http://badassdigest.com/2013/01/26/why-im-butt-hurt-about-j.j.-abrams)]- _Matt_

### Jurassic Park 3D Blu-Ray gets a release date

Jurassic Park is coming to theatres in 3D in April, and then it’s coming to 3D Blu-Ray. Mark April 23rd on your calendars if you want to pick it up.

If you don’t care about 3D you can get all three movies on regular blu-ray on the 26th of March.

[source: [The Verge](http://www.theverge.com/2013/1/27/3921848/jurassic-park-3d-blu-ray-release-april)] – _Matt_

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Review: Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters

Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters

I must admit that when I first started hearing about Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters I had some moderately high hopes. You see, there’s a type of movie that I would rather enjoy: the popcorn flick. You know the type; it’s a bit ridiculous, with lots of one-liners and actors having fun. We’re not talking about high art here; we’re talking about fun. Fun at the movies.

We’re talking about the type of movie where you sit down, turn your brain off and enjoy the ride. I was disappointed by a couple of films that promised to be this last year. So, how are we doing with the first big effort this year? Actually, pretty good!

Director Tommy Wirkola’s resume isn’t that long, but he’s best known for the horror comedy Dead Snow, a horror-comedy film released a few years back about a group of kids being terrorized by Nazi zombies. Thinking about that movie now, it feels like a dry run leading up to this. Where that movie faltered mixing up the horror and comedy, this movie has a pretty good mix of action and comedy plus a healthy dose of blood and guts and gore to round things out.

The story is fairly basic. Hansel and Gretel survive the childhood ordeal slightly differently than you remember it from the fairy tale and end up orphan witch hunters who come to a town with a bunch of kids gone missing under mysterious circumstances. Much anachronistic badassery ensues.

There’s not anything here you haven’t seen before, though and at just over 90 minutes long, there isn’t really time for anything you haven’t seen before, either. This movie is short and to the point; what little back story we need is given in a brief prologue and then the beautifully animated credits, and then we jump right into the story.

This is actually one of the film’s major strengths. Previous fairy tale re-imaginings I’ve seen that try to make sure you know they’re serious films end up boring. This movie doesn’t want you to be anything other than entertained, so the plot is kept to a minimum and the action to a maximum, and despite its predictability, it works. When things are revealed, you’re not going to be surprised, but you’ll probably be too busy enjoying a well-staged fight, some well-executed gore, or a zingy one-liner to care.

Speaking of action and gore, there’s a nice blend of practical and digital effects at play, too. Some things are obviously CG, but there’s one big practical effect that I loved. The film is rife with anachronism as well; seemingly set in the early 1800s, but the weapons in Hansel and Gretel’s arsenal appear to be from anywhere from the 1860s to the 1920s, and everyone speaks in a thoroughly modern mode of speech.

I’m sure a lot of these elements are going to wear thin pretty quickly for some. Chalk it up to the film’s short running time that they did not for me.

The film stars do pretty well with what they’re given. Jeremy Renner might be phoning it in, but Jeremy Renner phoning it in is still pretty good. Gemma Arterton plays the whole thing as an over-the-top ass-kicker and gets some great one-liners in, and while Famke Janssen isn’t amazing, her character is such a one-dimensional bad guy that it doesn’t really matter. The bottom line is that it seems like everyone involved is in on the joke, and as such it feels like everyone involved is having a blast making the movie.

Despite being a little repetitive, and a little derivative, Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters is a solid B-movie, delivering action and effects and, where it needs to, performances. It’s not high art, but it is a good time at the movies.

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Awesome Classics: Wing Commander (1990)

Wing Commander Title

I’m sitting in front of a blank screen. The computer is on, it just doesn’t display much beyond the letter C, a colon, and a blinking cursor. I type my way into a directory, load up a `.exe` file and wait while it performs memory checks before I get to fly off into space to shoot up the aggressors from the Empire of Kilrah.

It’s 1991, I’m 10, and I’m playing **Wing Commander** for what must be the one hundredth time. I don’t just mean I’ve loaded the game up that many times, I mean I’ve played through it that many times. Believe you me this is no easy feat; **Wing Commander** is not a short game.

It is a cool game though. Set in the 2650s **Wing Commander** puts you in the cockpit of a space fighter fighting an ongoing war between humanity and the Empire of Kilrah, a race of large bipedal cat people. You get to fly several different fighters over the course of the game, in several types of missions.

It plays out in full 3D space and was one of the first I remember doing so. Every fighter has it’s own cockpit details and strategies for flying combat. Each of the enemy ships (both fighters and capital classes) had their own distinct set of strengths and weaknesses as well. There’s no difficulty scale either so everyone who plays it gets as close to the same experience as can be given the fluid nature of the story (more on that in the moment). The graphics are sprites, not rasterized, however the game still looks amazing to my eye. The amount of detail they were able to cram in in an age where system resources were so limited is kind of amazing. The sound is all midi tracks, but they do sound great.

Wing Commander Rapier Cockpit

The cockpit (pictured above is the cockpit from the Rapier, the last fighter you fly in the game) is where the action happens. You go out on sorties to carry out various goals but you always get the chance to fight the fur balls. How well you fight them and accomplish mission goals dictates how the war goes in the system you are currently in and after a few missions your carrier, the Tiger’s Claw, jumps to the next system.

Here’s the brilliant bit though: if you win the current system you go one way, if you lose you go another. I have played this game _dog knows how many times_ and I doubt I took the same route through the systems twice until I got really good at it (and even then not so much).

The game has two distinct endings (one where you win the war, one where you lose) and you can take any number of paths to get to either.

This is kind of awesome as it encourages you to accept your failures. Because you can fight your way back to the winning path at almost any point (or start to lose at almost any point) there’s no need to save your game and obsessively play each mission until you win it, just go with the flow and see how you do. You can almost count on not winning every system in fact, because there is one mission which is nearly impossible. I can only remember beating it once, but my ship was so beat up by the end that I couldn’t dock with the Tiger’s Claw, I had to eject and get picked up.

Even if you lose it’s nice to just enjoy the story; and there is a story. Between missions you go to the officers lounge and speak to two pilots sitting in the bar and the bartender. They give you some battle strategy, news on how the war is going, but all in pre scripted conversations between them and your character.

Unless of course they were killed in a previous mission. Now, other pilots don’t die unless they are on your wing, but the knowledge they have is sometimes incredibly useful. You get a new wingman in every system (and you’re usually reassigned to a new squadron/fighter) but if you’re out fragging hairballs and your wingman is killed you have to complete any remaining missions without them and you never get the benefit of their insight at the bar.

Wing Commander Medals

In addition to being transferred from squadron to squadron at the end of the mission set in each system, if you perform well enough you can also get promoted or awarded medals for valour.

The above screenshot was taken near the end of my most recent play through the game, major is the highest rank and I’ve been awarded multiple bronze, silver and gold stars.

I know there is a metric for how they are awarded but I don’t really care. They are kind of nice to receive, but they don’t affect the story. That screenshot could be in the last system to win the game or to lose. You can go the whole game without ever being promoted or awarded a medal and the story still plays out to the win or the loss.

There’s obviously a lot of nostalgia in this title for me, I’ve played it in some form since I was 10 years old. Don’t let my dad hear this, but 1990 was a long time ago and things have come a long way but I _still_ fire up Wing Commander every now and again because I still love playing it. If that doesn’t mean it’s a great game I don’t know what does.

Wing Commander is [still available, packaged with it’s 1992 sequel Wing Commander II: Wrath of the Kilrathi for Mac and Windows](http://www.gog.com/gamecard/wing_commander_1_2 “Wing Commander 1 + 2”) for about 6$ USD as of this writing so don’t take my word for it, fire it up and see for yourself what I’m talking about. You won’t regret it.

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Quick Thoughts on Les Misérables, Argo and Silver Linings Playbook

I was meant to have seen a new movie this week but I’m on vacation and things got out of hand so I did not (yet).

Because I’m on vacation though I have seen a boatload of movies and thought I’d briefly talk about some of the ones I have seen, specifically the three I watched which are nominated for best picture at this year’s Oscars.

Les Misérables

Les Misérables

I can see why Les Misérables is nominated for all the awards. It’s a big-budget production of one of the most beloved musicals ever. Hugh Jackman is great, and Anne Hathaway is amazing as Fantine, and they are both deserving of their acting nominations. The entire cast is pretty great, in point of fact, with the debatable exception of Russell Crowe, who, while he isn’t bad, does appear a bit uncomfortable throughout. Maybe that makes sense for Javert, but it didn’t sit right with me.

Where the film fails for me is the directing. Sure, the film looks pretty amazing, and to be honest, I really like the live singing aspect –if you hadn’t heard already, everyone sang their parts live on set rather than lip-syncing pre-recorded performances– as it means they had more leeway to actually act out their performances rather than match what they did before. However, much of the film is shot in closeup on the performer’s face.

I dreamed a dream, in particular, a song that would do well by some staging/movement, is filmed with Anne Hathaway just sitting there belting it out with the camera pointed at her face. Valjean’s Soliloquy is a little better in that he gets the move around, but the camera is locked on his face, and he’s looking right at the camera the entire time, so you don’t really get to see any of what’s going on other than his lips moving.

I think I get what director Tom Hooper was going for, trying to make it intimate; however in the end, it’s weird to think that a musical with such grandiose songs is filmed in such a small way and to be honest, I don’t think it really works.

Conclusion: See it. It’s worth seeing just for the singing. Oscar is Anne Hathaway’s to lose at this point, and while I respect its nomination for Best Picture, I don’t think it should win. Tom Hooper isn’t nominated for best director, and I am fine with that.

Argo

Argo

I like stories about heroism, but what I love about Argo is that it’s such a quiet story about heroism. No epic gun fights, no explosions, no car chases, just the constant threat of being caught.

Ben Affleck directs and stars as Tony Mendez, the man who orchestrated the rescue of 6 diplomatic officers in hiding in 1979 revolutionary Iran. The idea is to get them out by claiming they are a film crew scouting exotic locations for a Star Wars rip-off called Argo.

The story is brilliant from start to finish. It mixes just the right amount of humour into the dramatic script, mostly supplied by Alan Arkin as the Hollywood producer recruited to help sell the idea of the fake movie to the public.

Arkin is gold here; it’s the type of role he excels at playing. He’s nominated for an Oscar and it’s well deserved.

Affleck himself is good too, playing Mendez very reservedly, reflecting a man under stress from being responsible for these people’s lives but also going through a separation and trying to maintain a relationship with his kid.

I happen to think that Affleck is a great director as well. Yes, he’s made a lot of better acting choices lately, but this is his feature film and the third time he’s hit it out of the park.

I love spy films, but in particular, a spy film that’s executed in such a way to be entirely believable with real stress and peril for the characters (even when you know how it ends) is a difficult thing to pull off.

Conclusion: Must see. Irksome that Affleck, who already won a Golden Globe for directing this, isn’t nominated for the Oscar.

Silver Linings Playbook

Silver Linings Playbook

Silver Linings Playbook is a good movie. Maybe even a great one, and I can see why so many people are connecting with it. It’s a fantasy story, that’s why.

This is a movie that, for two whole acts, shows us characters with real problems, and then in the third act, everyone lives happily ever after, and everything is fine, and all the problems seem to be gone.

Jennifer Lawrence is an amazing actress, and I’m going to say right now that she deserves the Golden Golden Globe she won and the Oscar I think she will win, but this is a role tailor-made to win Oscars, the slightly crazy receiving sex addict “bird with a broken wing who is just quirky enough to counteract the male leads crazy” character. Hell, it might be more tailor-made than the “prostitute with a heart of gold struggling to support her child in a situation that grows ever more dire with each frame that passes” that Anne Hathaway gets to play as Fantine.

Well, maybe not, but she’s still amazing and Bradley Cooper and Robert de Niro both stand out as well. Make no mistake, they all acted the shit out of this.

It’s just that the third act is entirely predictable and doesn’t really jive with the rest of the movie. It devolves from something interesting into a series of movie cliches. There is literally a point in this movie where I could have turned it off because I knew everything else that was going to happen.

I can see why people connect with this movie, but I don’t see why it’s nominated for best picture of the year.

Conclusion: Definitely see it. It’s worth it for Jennifer Lawrence alone, even if her character is unbelievable. Just maybe don’t expect it to be as good as everyone told you it is.

Wrapping up

I’ve seen almost all the Best Picture nominees now and am starting to better understand what I think should win. More on that closer to the date in question. In the meantime, what did you guys think of these three films? Are they worthy of the nomination? Did any performances stand out? Comment below!

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Review: Zero Dark Thirty

Zero Dark Thirty

A few years ago, Kathryn Bigelow was developing a movie about the search for Osama bin Laden. To that point, he had eluded all efforts to find him. The film was meant to end at the Battle of Tora Bora where they had thought he was hiding, but ultimately, they failed to find him.

The film was meant to end on an ambiguous note, sort of a “what do we do now?”, but then on May 6th 2011 the world found out that US Special Forces had found and killed him. The film was reworked, but rather than becoming a propaganda film, it became about the work the intelligence community did to find him.

The result is pretty spectacular.

Zero Dark Thirty is a spy film but not what you’d normally expect from a spy film because the main character, Maya, isn’t jumping from rooftop to rooftop or saving the world from a madman or ferreting out a mole; she’s diligently and tirelessly searching for a single man, using all the resources available to her.

As if we needed reminding of the situation, the film starts with a black screen with radio communications playing from 11th September 2001, something I found particularly effective. I’m not American, but I remember exactly where I was and what I was doing when it all went down, as I expect most people do.

The film then plays out the entire ten-year search in its gritty, gruelling and bureaucratic detail, spearheaded by Maya.

To say it’s an effective movie would be the understatement of the year. What they had to do –including torture, groundwork, and long sleepless nights– shows the toll on us all through Maya and Jessica Chastain weathers it like a champ. She’s already won a Golden Globe for the role, and she deserves her Oscar nod more than anyone else I’ve seen so far for the upcoming ceremony. But, make no mistake; the Oscar is hers to lose.

Everything in this film is utterly compelling. When we finally get to the final act of the raid on bin Laden’s compound by Navy Seals, the idea that realistic military tactics and execution thereof aren’t filmable in a meaningful way is shown to be false. In fact, any time anyone says this to you from now on, tell them to watch Zero Dark Thirty.

This film deserves to win all the awards it’s nominated for. It probably won’t win them all, but it should, and in addition to everything above, because it tells us what happened but doesn’t tell us how we should feel about it. The torture and humiliation are on screen, but there’s no heavy-handed speech about how it’s terrible but necessary or how it is destroying the country’s soul or any of that. Just, here it is, feel how you feel.

That, in and of itself, with such a talked about yet delicate subject matter, is a major achievement.

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Review: Gangster Squad

Gangster Squad

Ryan Gosling. Sean Penn. Josh Brolin. Emma Stone. Robert Patrick. Anthony Mackie, Giovanni Ribisi, and Michael Pena. Directed by Reuben Fleischer in a post-World War II cops vs. Gangsters story. This is a movie I wanted to see from the moment I heard about it.

Set in Los Angeles and facing off against famed mob boss Mickey Cohen, the players form an elite and off the books squad of cops who at the behest of the Chief of Police (played by Nick Nolte) take the battle against organized crime right to the head honcho. They hit him hard and where it hurts.

Does this sound familiar? Yeah, it sounds a lot like The Untouchables. It’s too bad it’s nowhere near as good as The Untouchables.

Now, that’s not to say that this is a truly terrible movie, just that it’s not very good. The problems are twofold, first there’s the issue of balance.

Half the time, it seems to be a serious cop drama complete with “Are we doing the right thing?” moments, and the rest of the time, it’s trying to be Dick Tracy 2, complete with characters who are either stereotypes or caricatures (more on that in a moment).

Seriously. Sean Penn plays Cohen so over the top that he’s hard to take seriously, and Troy Garity is his main henchman with a scar over his face that damaged his eye, and is credited simply as “One Eyed Assassin”. Meanwhile, Josh Brolin is the tough-as-nails, uncompromising lead detective, and Ryan Gosling is the sardonic, morally grey detective who must decide whether he’s really in the game. The problem here is that the movie never commits to one tone. Is it light and fun, or is it dark and serious? The answer is neither because it seems to try so hard to meet in the middle.

If any of this is starting to sound familiar again, it’s because of the second problem: there’s nothing here you haven’t seen before. There are two deaths on the squad, and usually, I’d consider that a spoiler, but if you can’t tell who it’s going to be after each of their introductory scenes (and what the immediate follow-up is going to be), then you’re probably watching a different movie than I was.

The film has other problems as well. A one liner here and there is good, several one liners during every sequence is silly. The rest of the dialogue is pretty bad, too. Even the lines that sounded cool in the trailer fall flat in the movie itself, and the writers are trying so hard to make every character cool that none of them get any actual development. Everyone ends up just being a pastiche of others you’ve seen before. The Hard Ass, the cowboy, the tech guy, the minorities struggling for acceptance, and the old man police chief.

Worse yet, none of the actors have any chemistry together. Sure, Josh Brolin and Mireille Enos have some, but the home story is a subplot, and Josh Brolin talking to almost anyone else feels forced. Even Ryan Gosling and Emma Stone don’t seem to connect despite having done so in other films.

There’s a lot to like here in the small details, though. The movie looks fantastic, from the sets to the costumes to the hair and makeup. The story isn’t bad, and we all know Reuben Fleischer loves his slow-motion shots. In the end though, the looks are just window dressing, the story is told with little nuance and terrible dialogue and the slow motion (and sped up) stuff just makes the pacing of the big final action sequence fall to pieces.

The scenes that play well are the action scenes (not sped up or slowed down) but almost feel like a different movie.

Gangster Squad was one of my most anticipated films of the year. Maybe because of that context, I am being hard on it, but I don’t think I am. It seems to be a movie made to make a great trailer. There are lots of one-liners to choose from, beautiful people in beautiful clothes on beautiful sets, and lots of action (and it does have a great couple of trailers). The problem is that they didn’t seem to be able to figure out what kind of movie they wanted to make or how they tried to play it, and the result is that the finished product is just a hot mess.

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2013 Oscar Nominees, Reactions, and a Few Predictions

It’s that time of year again: Awards Season. The Golden Globes are on this weekend and this week the [nominations for the 85th Annual Academy Awards were announced](http://oscar.go.com/nominees).

My reactions to the nominations are varied, but as per usual I’m more surprised by what’s _not_ on the list than what is.

I’m going to be up front about this too: I still haven’t seen all the films that are nominated, so my opinons here are a little skewed, so I’ll stick to talking about the ones I know (where I can).

The 2013 Oscar Nominations and my commentary thereon:

#### Best Picture

* “Argo”
* “Django Unchained”
* “Les Miserables”
* “Life of Pi”
* “Amour”
* “Lincoln”
* “Silver Linings Playbook”
* “Zero Dark Thirty”
* “Beasts of the Southern Wild”

My initial reaction here is that they can have as many as _ten_ nominations, they’ve nominated _nine_ films and The Master isn’t on the list. I mean, love it or hate it, The Master is the type of film the academy usually goes all in on.

Also, and while I personally didn’t care for it, I’m a little surprised that _The Dark Knight Rises_ isn’t on here in recognition of the trilogy that Christopher Nolan put together. I mean, they did it for Peter Jackson, why not Nolan?

I honestly don’t know what I’d pick from this list, I still haven’t seen Les Miserables, Django Unchained is amazing but Silver Linings Playbook is pretty much exactly the type of “quirky people” movie that actors love playing and love voting for, so we’ll see.

#### Actor in a Leading Role

* Bradley Cooper – “Silver Linings Playbook”
* Daniel Day-Lewis – “Lincoln”
* Hugh Jackman – “Les Miserables”
* Joaquin Phoenix – “The Master”
* Denzel Washington – “Flight”

I’m kind of shocked to see Bradley Cooper on this list, but then again as I mentioned before _Silver Linings Playbook_ is pretty much the type of film the Academy goes in for. Denzel is a bit of a wild card to me, he was great in Flight but I didn’t expect to see him here.

Daniel Day-Lewis and Hugh Jackman are completely not surprising: They’re both great actors and they’re both in great films.

I have a feeling that Day-Lewis or Jackman will take this category but I actually hope for Joaquin Phoenix. The man is completely transformed for his role in _The Master_. His slight slur, his ability to go from calm to explosively violent in a heartbeat, and even his hunched posture, the man disappeared into Freddie Quell.

And of course the lingering question: where the hell is Jamie Foxx’s name?? Or John Hawkes? Geez!

#### Actress in a Leading Role

* Jessica Chastain – “Zero Dark Thirty”
* Jennifer Lawrence – “Silver Linings Playbook”
* Emmanuelle Riva – “Amour”
* Quvenzhané Wallis – “Beasts of Southern Wild”
* Naomi Watts – “The Impossible”

To be fair, I haven’t seen Amour, Beasts of a Southern Wild or The Impossible yet so I have no idea who is going to take this. I do, however, love the idea that either Jessica Chastain or Jennifer Lawrence might win since I honestly think they were both robbed in the past (Chastain in _The Help_ and Lawrence in _Winter’s Bone_).

#### Actor in a Supporting Role

* Alan Arkin – “Argo”
* Robert De Niro – “Silver Linings Playbook”
* Philip Seymour Hoffman – “The Master”
* Tommy Lee Jones – “Lincoln”
* Christoph Waltz – “Django Unchained”

Interesting fact: All five nominees here are Oscar winners already. Interesting Fact: Leonardo diCaprio has not won an Oscar before, was the scene stealing standout of the show in Django Unchained, and isn’t on this list.

Now, i don’t mean to demean any of these guys work but at the same time I do mean tot point out that Leonardo has been _fucking robbed_ this year.

As to who will win? I’m pulling for Phillip Seymour Hoffman. His work in The Master is stellar and he deserves to go home with his second trophy for it.

I’m going to say something that will make me sound like a fanboy now: I think Bruce Willis should be on this list for Looper. If you don’t believe me just go watch it again and pay close attention when he goes after his first target.

#### Actress in a Supporting Role

* Amy Adams – “The Master”
* Sally Field – “Lincoln”
* Anne Hathaway – “Les Miserables”
* Helen Hunt – “The Sessions”
* Jackie Weaver – “Silver Linings Playbook”

Here’s a category where I think the younger actresses are going to battle it out. Amy Adams is phenomenal in The Master and Anne Hathaway sang “I Dreamed A Dream” on screen, live. Completely different roles to be sure, both both are great.

Not to sound like I have Django on the brain, but Kerri Washington could likely have done with a nod here. Hell, so could Emily Blunt for _Looper_.

#### Best Animated Feature

* “Brave”
* “Frankenweenie”
* “ParaNorman”
* “The Pirates! Band of Misfits”
* “Wreck-It Ralph”

Pixar has a nomination and usually that’s enough to secure themselves a win, but Brave –while great by normal standards– was just ok by Pixars usual standards.

I’d really like to see this go to Wreck-it Ralph.

#### Best Director

* “Amour” – Michael Haneke
* “Beasts of the Southern Wild” – Benh Zeitlin
* “Life of Pi” – Ang Lee
* “Lincoln” – Steven Spielberg
* “Silver Linings Playbook” – David O. Russell

I haven’t seen enough of these to comment. Lincoln was incredibly directed but I’m not so sure about Silver Linings Playbook. Maybe David O. Russell is nominated because he probably should have won for _The Fighter_.

No Tarantino? No Rian Johnson? No Ben Affleck? No Kathryn Bigelow? What the hell? And what about Paul Thomas Anderson? You’re telling me that the three main actors from his film had oscar calibre performances and he had nothing to do with that? Riiiight.

And again, a little surprised to not see Christopher Nolan on this list for the same reasons I mentioned above.

#### Best Original Screenplay

* “Amour” – Michael Haneke
* “Django Unchained” – Quentin Tarantino
* “Flight” – John Gatins
* “Moonrise Kingdom” – Wes Anderson & Roman Coppola
* “Zero Dark Thirty” – Mark Boal

This is the one that Tarantino will win. I can’t see how he wouldn’t given that he was snubbed on the Best Director list. But where is Rian Johnson on this list? She should be here for the same reason Tarantino is.

#### Best Adapted Screenplay

* “Argo” – Chris Terrio
* “Beasts of the Southern Wild” – Lucy Alibar & Benh Zeitlin
* “Life of Pi” – David Magee
* “Lincoln” – Tony Kushner
* “Silver Linings Playbook” – David O. Russell

I’ve only read the source material for one of these and I haven’t seen the movie version of it yet so I’m gonna keep my trap shut.

I’m going to wager a guess that either Silver Linings Playbook or Argo takes it.

#### The Rest and Closing Thoughts

That’s really it for the major categories, the rest are mostly technical. It’s nice to see that Skyfall picked up a nomination in the original song category, I loved the song and I hope either it or _Everybody Needs A Best Friend_ from _Ted_ takes it home.

It’s more than a little strange to see _The Master_ left off the cinematography list, it’s being snubbed for best picture is one thing, it was easily the most stunningly shot film I saw in 2012.

I’m a bit sad to see that _Looper_ was passed over entirely. It’s incredibly well written and it’s cast are are great. I know that the academy doesn’t usually go in for genre film but still. Great films deserve recognition. At least give him the screenplay nod!!

Last year I [live blogged the ceremony](https://awesomefriday.ca/2012/02/oscars-2012-live-blog/) and, barring any unforeseen circumstances I’ll be doing the same thing year, so check back here on 24th of February!

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Matt’s Most Anticipated of 2013

2012 was one of the best years for film that I can remember and I’m honestly hoping that 2013 meets or beats it in terms of number of quality releases, and more importantly in the quality of those releases. There’s a lot coming out this year so here’s the ten that I am looking forward to most.

I’m listing these in order of release and not order of anticipation, partly because I find them hard to rank but mostly because I am looking forward to them all for different reasons.

And with that, here are the movies I am most looking forward to this year.

### Gangster Squad (11 January)

Gangster Squad

I’ve actually been waiting for this since last year since its original 2012 release was pushed after the Aurora Shooting.

Ryan Gosling, Josh Brolin and Sean Penn in an old school cops vs. gangsters film is a hard recipe to screw up. I love the cast, I love the premise, and while director Rueben Fleischer has only made a couple of films, they were both good and he’s made a host of music videos and commercials which were also good.

I worry about the [re-shoots that happened following Aurora last year](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gangster_Squad#Association_with_the_2012_Aurora_shooting) but not very much considering the scene had just been relocated and re-staged rather than excised entirely.

### The Place Beyond The Pines (29 March)

The Place Beyond The Pines

Yes, another Ryan Gosling movie. It’s true: I’m a fan of the baby goose. More than that though, I’m a fan of Ryan Gosling because he’s a great actor.

Gosling previously teamed with director Derek Cianfrance in 2010s _Blue Valentine_ and in that film both Gosling and co-star Michelle Williams knocked it right outta the park. Seriously, if you haven’t seen that movie just go find it and watch it (but be aware, it has some hard to watch scenes).

Ryan Gosling playing a stunt bike rider robbing banks to provide for his son while being chased by Bradley Cooper as a cop mixed up with some crooked colleagues? It’s an intriguing set up and one I can’t wait to see.

### 42 (12 April)

42

I’ll admit this one is a bit of a wild card pick; chalk it up to my love of baseball. On the other hand this is the story of a modern American legend in Jackie Robinson and it’s being directed by Brian Helgeland, the guy who wrote _L.A. Confidential_, _A Knights Tale_ and _Mystic River_. There’s a lot to like about that fact alone but when you add in Harrison Ford as Branch Rickey (the guy who dared to sign Jackie Robinson in an era when racism was still an OK thing) things get more interesting.

Chadwick Boseman is a relative newcomer here, but if this works out this could be a star turn for him and I’m always interested in seeing that.

### Iron Man 3 (3 May)

Iron Man 3

I’m a huge Marvel geek and I’m a huge fan of their grand experiment to bring comic book continuity to the big screen. If you’ve been paying attention you may have already [gotten this impression](https://awesomefriday.ca/2013/01/matts-best-of-2012/ “Matt’s Best of 2012”).

Robert Downey Jr. is among the best cast of the Marvel Heroes currently on screen and it’ll be a pleasure seeing him as Tony Stark again. Hell, even in the kind of boring Iron Man 2 he was fun to watch and with Shane Black directing and Don Cheadle returning as James “Rhodey” Rhodes/War Machine one can only assume that there’ll be some great “buddy cop” kind of sequences as they battle the armoured bad guys.

Sir Ben Kingsley is playing the Mandarin, a character with supernatural powers in the comics, so it will be cool to see how they reconcile that with the technological world of Iron Man (that is, does he even have his powers or are The Ten Rings from Iron Man all he controls or will they be technological or what?).

Another exciting tidbit is that the story is based on _Extremis_ by Warren Ellis, which is one of my favourite Iron Man stories and sees Tony Stark go through some interesting stuff.

Plus, this is the first film in Marvel’s second phase so I’m looking forward to seeing if I can pick out any world building or portents that’ll give me an idea what they’re planning for Avengers 2.

### The Great Gatsby (10 May)

The Great Gatsby

F. Scott Fitzgerald’s _The Great Gatsby_ is an American classic, a fact that even though I am a Canadian I can certainly appreciate. I’m not going to sugar coat this though: I’ve never actually read it. I’ve always meant to but for some reason it’s just never happened.

Now there’s this, Leonardo DiCaprio re-teaming with director Baz Luhrmann in what looks to be a perfect part for the former and potentially the best looking film from the latter. The film is full of talented people not the least of which is Carey Mulligan who has shone brightly in everything I’ve seen her in, even as Sally Sparrow in Doctor Who.

Plus, if it turns out to suck I won’t have to be bothered by how the movie was a crappy adaptation of the book.

### Star Trek Into Darkness (17 May)

Star Trek Into Darkness

To say I am anticipating this film is an exercise in understatement. Understand that I am a life long Star Trek fan, some of my earliest memories are watching The Original Series with my father. I’ve seen every episode of every show (including the animated series) and every movie. In 2009 JJ Abrams brought Star Trek back to the big screen in a big way and I _fucking loved it_.

Long story short: if this list were ranked, Star Trek Into Darkness would be #1 on the list.

I happen to think that the previous film was nearly perfectly cast so I seriously can’t wait to see the whole crew back again. Yes, even Chris Pine. More importantly, I can’t wait to see Benedict Cumberbatch as the villain in this. So far I’ve only really seen him play good guys so it will be nice to see him put on his evil face. The man is a hell of an actor and this will very likely be a hell of a film.

There’s so much more I could say here, but the bottom line is this: _is it May 17th yet???_

### Much Ado About Nothing (7 June)

Much Ado About Nothing

So apparently while filming last years _The Avengers_ Joss Whedon called up a bunch of his friends and shot an adaptation of Shakespeare’s _Much Ado About Nothing_ in his own house over 12 days or so.

Let’s rephrase that: the guy making the biggest film of last year made an indie Shakespeare adaption in his home in his spare time. That alone is pretty cool.

But this is also Joss Whedon we’re talking about here. Love him or hate him he’s certainly done some interesting stuff and is really good at managing large casts. I’m also just curious to see what he does with Shakespeare and how he worked his house into the film.

Plus, this is full of his buddies like Nathan Fillion (playing Dogberry), Amy Acker (Beatrice) and Clark Gregg (Leonato).

So basically it’s a bunch of awesome people doing a version of a play by the greatest playwright ever as adapted by a fantastic director. So where do I sign, exactly?

### Pacific Rim (12 July)

Pacific Rim

Let’s see, director with a crazy and unique visual style? Check. Giant Monsters? Check. Giant Robots fighting those monsters? Check. Two people whose minds link via a computer voiced by the same actress as GLaDOS from Portal? Check. A cast including Idris Elba and Charlie Hunnam? Check.

I dunno, maybe this movie wasn’t made for me specifically but there’s certainly a lot of boxes checked off here.

Plus, it’s a disaster movie where people are fighting for humanity as a whole to survive (check) against ridiculous odds. I’m sure that the giant robot that turns the tide will be obsolete or broken or something too but cliches done well are still entertaining as hell, and Guillermo del Toro is a pretty great director so I have little doubt he can pull this off.

### The Worlds End (25 October)

The World's End

Simon Pegg, Nick Frost and Edgar Wright are finally going to release the third in their “Three Flavours Cornetto Trilogy” each of which has been an homage to a certain type of film so far (if you’ve been hiding in cave these last few years, _Shaun of the Dead_ was zombies and _Hot Fuzz_ was buddy cop action).

In addition to apparently featuring the mint chocolate chip cornetto, apparently the boys will be on a massive pub crawl towards The World’s End Pub and the world might actually be ending while they do it. That description alone is enough to get me in theatres but rest assured the film will be full of their signature comedic style and mile a minute on the nose pop culture riffs that made the previous two films (and the series they did, _Spaced_) so laugh out loud funny.

### Enders Game (1 November)

Ender's Game

I am of the opinion that if you have never read Orson Scott Cards phenomenal book _Ender’s Game_ you should probably stop reading this **right now**, go find a copy and read it. There’s even a fantastic [graphic novel adaptation](http://www.comixology.com/Enders-Game/comics-series/8011 “Ender’s Game on Comixology”) if you’re so inclined. I’ll wait here while you do that.

…

All done? Good, then I don’t have to spoil anything. Now do you see why a movie version of this could be amazing? Harrison Ford as Commander Graff and Sir Ben Kingsley as Mazer? Asa Butterfield as Ender himself? There’s not a lot to dislike here. Well, except that Gavin Hood is directing, but remember that while he did direct _X-Men Origins: Wolverine_ he also directed (and won an Oscar for) _Tsotsi_, which is an amazing film.

### What’s Missing?

There’s certainly a lot more than 10 films coming out this year and more than 10 that I am quite looking forward to. _Thor: The Dark World_ (8 Nov) and _Elysium_ (9 Aug) both only missed being on the list by the skin of their teeth –if I wasn’t a baseball fan you can bet one of them would have made it– and then there’s the Spike Lee remake of _Oldboy_ (11 Oct), _Man of Steel_ (14 Jun) trying to get Superman right for the first time in decades and Tom Hanks playing Walr Disney in _Saving Mr. Banks_ (20 Dec) and _Movie 43_ (25 Jan) doing it’s best to offend, well, everyone it seems.

It definitely looks like it’s going to be a good year for genre film in particular this year, which means this is going to be a good year for nerds like me.

You may have noticed that I didn’t mention _The Wolverine_ (26 Jul) or _The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug_ (13 Dec) and that’s because while I am looking forward to both of these I’m not really excited to see either. That might change once I see some trailers though so time will tell.

Sometime toward the end of 2013 I plan to revisit this list and recap whether I was excited to see the terribly great or the greatly terrible. In the mean time, what are your most anticipated films of the year?

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On Frame Rates

The Hobbit

This past weekend, I finally had a chance to see The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey for the second time and this time, I saw it in the shiny new HFR format. You’ve probably heard, at least in passing, some of the hoopla about this because not only is The Hobbit the first film to be shot and projected this way, but many critics really do not like it.

For those living under a rock, HFR is short for High Frame Rate. Film for my entire life and many years before has been projected at 24 frames per second (FPS). This wasn’t always the case, but suffice it to say that if you’re alive now, chances are you’ve only ever seen 24 FPS projection (except maybe at a museum or something).

Why is this important? Mainly because 24 FPS isn’t really high, and many things in movies work because your brain has to fill in so much information between the frames that many effects –whether practical or digital– only work well because of what isn’t on-screen.

HFR filming and projecting now double that frame rate to 48 FPS, and the result is that, basically, your brain doesn’t have to work as hard, and everything looks much, much, much clearer.

So, what does this mean to me? Quite a bit, as it turns out: I like it. I actually like it quite a bit.

This means I disagree with most of the critics, but from what I’ve read, most are just saying, “It doesn’t look like a movie”, which simply isn’t true. It does look like a movie; it just doesn’t look like movies always have.

There are two noticeable side effects of HFR. The first is that things seem to move faster. This is because your brain isn’t filling in so many gaps like I mentioned above, but honestly, this one goes away quickly. It took me maybe 10 minutes to get used to how things appeared in HFR, but once I was, I felt like I was seeing a movie for the first time.

The other, more significant problem is that because there’s so much more information on-screen and because there are so many effects in this movie, a lot of them are a _lot_ easier to see, and that can sometimes kick you out of the dream, as it were. Some people have complained about being able to see make-up effects and props (hello, rubber swords!) more quickly, but this didn’t bother me as much as the digital effects. Green-screened shots are apparent, and CGI looks… well, not cheap, but certainly easier to spot.

But these quibbles will go away as effects get better, and as more films shoot this way, they’ll have to improve.

I’m not going to lie to you; the technology is new and exciting and not quite there yet, but I, for one, can’t wait until HFR is the norm because all our movies are going to look a hell of a lot better once it is.

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Matt’s Best of 2012

It is now 2013. Another year is over, so here’s a brief look at what I thought of 2012.

Favourite Film – The Avengers

The Avengers
The Avengers

There’s so much I can say here but what it comes down to is that I’ve been waiting for this film for basically my entire life. Having been reading Marvel comics since I was a kid seeing all these characters brought to the big screen in a way that doesn’t suck on their own was good, seeing them all on-screen together in a way that doesn’t suck is fucking amazing. Because let’s face it: a lot of superhero movies suck.

You see it’s not just that this is a good film that makes it my favourite of the year, hell I’ll even admit that there are a bunch of objectively better films that came out this year, but The Avengers is the geek dream realized: comic book continuity brought to the movies. Proof that you can create an entire universe in film and the masses won’t reject it. Proof to the studios —finally— that their audience is full of intelligent people who are looking for an interconnected film series with characters that stand both on their own and as a team in a single universe. Yes, I realize I just said the same thing three times. If you think The Avengers isn’t a milestone in filmmaking consider this: Fox just hired Mark Millar to oversee X-Men continuity. DC had the ending of Man of Steel retooled to leave it open for a Justice League style team-up movie down the road.

And aside from all that, it’s just a damn good movie. It’s near-perfectly cast, they’re all clearly having fun, Joss Whedon’s script is lively and full of humour, and it features one of the best action set pieces of the year. Who knew basically destroying New York could be so fun? More than that though, Joss Whedon understands that what makes a large cast work isn’t the action or the bad guy’s plans, it’s the relationships between the characters and he completely nails this aspect of the film.

At the moment when The Avengers finally assemble for the third act of the film, I was one of the people standing and cheering, and I fully expect that the next time they assemble, I will be again.

Honourable Mentions

“I don’t want to talk about time travel, we’ll be here all day.” is my favourite line from Looper. This is the scene in which writer/director told us “stop worrying and enjoy this story because the story is what matters.” All of this is completely true. Looper is a film that tells you that it’s about time travel, but it’s really about love. That message, coupled with fantastic performances from the cast, a brilliant script make this a must-see.

Skyfall is the best James Bond story in years. It’s also the third act in a larger story that sees the latest Bond become fully realized and ready to move the franchise forward. Combine that with some of the best action direction of the year from Sam Mendes, and you’ve got a recipe for a great movie, which this is.

If you’d told me last year that one weekend in the summer all the guys I knew would be in a theatre watching a movie about a teddy bear (and all the girls were watching a movie about a stripper), I’d probably have given you a funny look, but that’s pretty much exactly what happened when Ted came out. It takes the ageing buddy movie schtick and manages to make it fresh again, it’s hilarious from start to finish, and it gives Mila Kunis a character to play. What more could you want?

Favourite Game – Punch Quest

Punch Quest
Punch Quest

I actually struggled with this category because, in all honesty, I don’t really have that many memorable gaming experiences from the year. There were a few flash-in-the-pans like Borderlands 2, but it ended up not holding my attention for more than a couple of weeks. Punch Quest, however, I can’t seem to get enough of.

There’s not really that much new stuff here; it’s an infinite runner that features punching. Strange at it may seem, that simple addition makes it completely addictive. Like all good single-player games, it engages me to keep playing by asking me to compete with myself and also by offering upgrades that make the punching cooler, routes that lead to boss battles or treasure troves, and a host of other “I can’t wait to see what comes next” moments in the gameplay.

Biggest Disappointment – The Dark Knight Rises

The Dark Knight Rises
The Dark Knight Rises

You know I could go on and on and on about The Dark Knight Rises, but I am not going to go into specifics because I already did on the podcast but also because the specifics don’t really matter.

Sure, there are plot holes that you could drive a bus through, and there’s a lot of them, but you know what? Batman Begins and The Dark Knight both have some pretty big holes in them too. The difference is that where Batman Begins and The Dark Knight are both compelling stories, and The Dark Knight Rises is not.

Batman Begins had Bruce Wayne training and learning to become Batman. The Dark Knight pitted Batman against The Joker, his philosophical opposite. The Dark Knight Rises had Batman face off against his equal after learning to become Batman again, twice. This is not compelling; it’s repetition. Bane, despite Tom Hardy wearing the mask, isn’t interesting and a last-minute twist robs all his characters weight.

I feel like Christopher Nolan might have been going for fan service with this one (and let’s face it if the story were a comic book few people would complain because comics are strange), tried to work too much into the story and the end is a non-compelling mess.

And how did Bruce Wayne get halfway around the world with no money or ID in just a few days and then enter Gotham while it was on a total lockdown, anyway?

Dishonourable Mentions

Halo 4 may have made all the money, but I personally didn’t connect with it in the same way that I did the previous 5 entries in the franchise. I can’t quite put my finger on why, but every time I got stuck I got frustrated rather than spurred to push harder as I did in Halo: Combat Evolved, Halo 2, Halo 3, Halo: ODST and Halo: Reach.

Prometheus was meant to be Ridley Scott’s triumphant return to SciFi and the Alien franchise. It’s pretty safe to say that this was one of my most anticipated releases of the year, so when it turned out to be a convoluted mess, you could say that I was disappointed. Listen to the podcast episode in which we talk about Prometheus to get a better idea of how I felt.

Top Three I haven’t Seen/Played

I’ve tried to see Django Unchained twice now and both times I’ve gone down to the theatre every show has been sold out. Love it or hate it, people are certainly seeing it. I have mixed feelings about Tarantino as a whole, but I loved Inglorious Basterds, and this one looks to be right up the same alley of bloody American history.

I’ve heard very mixed things about Les Miserables but I very much want to see it for myself. I love the idea of live singing in a movie, but I can see where that might detract from the show as well. Plus it’s full of people that I like, including Anne Hathaway and Hugh Jackman.

The C.I.A. says that Zero Dark Thirty isn’t realistic but I’m not sure I care. I’ve yet to hear a bad review, and it has one of the more interesting production histories of the year. Plus, Jessica Chastain. Just sayin’.

Conclusion

That’s about all I have for 2012. All in all, it was a pretty good year for film for me, but not so much for games. Hopefully, that changes in 2013!

Be sure to check out Simon’s Best of 2012 before you go, and have yourself a great 2013!

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Oscars 2012 Live Blog

Oscars 2012

Oscar night and I’m going to live blog the show. I was having trouble deciding where to start writing for the site and this seems like a golden opportunity really, just up and said “hey write about me!” So that is what I am doing. I will of course time stamp my thoughts as I have them, and hopefully provide you with enough context that you can read them without needing the show to be on in the background for you to understand what the hell I am talking about.

17:22: just getting set up with a place to write and record. Red carpet stuff is almost over, the show is about to start! Is a good thing we’re doing this without a screaming baby around. Oh, wait…

17:30: Aaaaaaaand show starting. Morgan Freeman on stage. He’s welcoming us to the show, and also Billy Crystals parody montage.

17:35: Montage over. "Say ‘I’m Batman, it’ll help me!’" was hilarious, but all the jokes are pretty …. Uh… Safe. I have a feeling this will be indicative of the rest of the show as well.

17:37: "Nothing takes your mind off these economic times like watching millionaires give each other golden statues.". Awesome, if a little obvious. Now the singing. Oh the singing. If only Billy Crystal could sing.

17:41: I should probably point out how cynical I am about the Oscars this year, in case it hasn’t come through yet. I have a bad feeling there’ll be no risks taken tonight, and the jokes aren’t that funny so far.

17:43: First award is the cinematography. Hugo wins. Second up is art direction. Hugo wins again. I haven’t seen this yet, but from what I have seen the film is gorgeous so this makes sense. I have no strong opinions about this either way really.

17:47: WTF is the band doing up in the box seats? Going back to Billy Crystal for a second my question is this: why the hell don’t they just get Hugh Jackman back again? Seriously; his song was way better and unlike Billy Crystal, he can actually sing.

17:52: And now a montage of iconic moments in film. Brett from Flight of the Conchords is in the audience and I blew Simons’s mind by telling him that Brett is nominated for the songs in The Muppets.

17:55: The Artist wins Best Costume Design. Not surprised. Everyone looked great in it. The Iron Lady wins for Makeup. They did do a. Good job of turning Meryl Streep into Mrs Thatcher and then ageing the crap out of her.

18:03: Montage of actors talking about their first movie-going experience. Mostly boring except that Brad Pitt dropped "War of the Gargantuas" which is kind of amazing. This is a movie which you need to see if you haven’t.

18:05: Sandra Bullock takes the stage. She’s about to speak Chinese. In German.

18:07: A Separation wins best foreign film. Iranian Film is meant to be gorgeous. We wonder if it’s a political decision at all, but it is meant to be an amazing film. Is that too cynical? I can’t tell anymore.

18:09: Christian Bale on stage to give away the Best Supporting Actress trophy. Still hoping for Jessica Chastain. Simon and Wife taking the piss out of Christian Bale’s accent. Funny, most Brits I know do this, take the piss out of every other Brits’ accent.

18:12: Octavia Spencer wins for The Help. Everyone is on their feet. Kind of brilliant. She was amazing after all. I maintain that the Octavia Spencer/Jessica Chastain storyline in The Help was the best part of the movie.

18:17: So far Sandra Bullock speaking Chinese in German, Iranian Director giving a political speech for his acceptance, and Octavia Spencer winning are the best moments of the show.

18:18: Ooooh Billy Crystal makes a joke that’s actually funny. "45-minute drive indeed."

18:20: Christopher Guest and co doing what appears to be ad lib focus group for Wizard of Oz. Kind of right up my alley. "I didn’t like it until the flying monkeys." Fred Willard FTW.

18:25: Girl With The Dragon Tattoo picks one up for best editing. Hugo for Sound Editing and Sound mixing. I really wanted Drive to win for sound editing, if only so that it could have an Oscar. I kind of wish that Transformers won for sound editing just to see everyone’s reaction and also the DVD cover a Transformers film that reads "Oscar Winner."

18:32: Can we have more Fred Willard, please?

18:34: Muppets on camera. It’s a good thing.

18:35: Cirque du Soleil interprets "going to the movies" in dance. This could actually be pretty interesting.

18:39: I wish that at some point in my life, I could be half as athletic as someone from Cirque. Seriously.

18:41: Robert Downey Jr and Gwyneth Paltrow presenting for documentaries. Not being very funny. Fuck I didn’t see any documentaries this year at all. Undefeated wins. Yay?

18:44: Huh, first instance of someone being played off. Even cut off the mic on the guys who won Best Documentary. Not really fair considering there were six of them.

18:46: Best Animated film is Rango. Fucking amazing since it’s clearly the best-animated film from 2011 and Gore Verbinski is overdue. Maybe a bit surprising that the film that was the best was chosen.

18:50: Any voice actors in the audience? I’d like to hear what you have to say about Chris Rock’s little description of your job. I’d be willing to bet that you’re maybe wanting to go all Hulk SMASH right now.

18:54: Emma Stone is amazing. That is all.

18:55: Lots of good choices for visual effects but Hugo wins. Seems like Hugo is going to win all the technical awards. I wonder how that bodes for the beat picture/director awards… No, I don’t, it bodes poorly.

18:59: Best Supporting Actor award. Christopher Plummer wins! Yes! About time. He’s generally speaking always great.

19:10: You know, I think they should just let the hosts of these shows run wild. When these jokes are so blatantly scripted they aren’t funny. If they’d just let them ad-lib and make fun of the audience it might actually be good. So far Billy Crystal’s best jokes have all been off-the-cuff remarks, like the one to the president of the academy, "mister excitement."

19:13: The Artist is totally going to win Best Score.

19:14: The Artist won Best Score. I mean, how could it not? The film is all music. On top of that, the score is really good, too. Also, John Williams had two nominations for the same score. YEAH, I SAID IT.

19:18: Will Ferrell and Zach Galifianakis presenting for best song. Muppets to win, right?

19:19: Bret Harrison of Flight of the Conchords is now an Oscar-winning musician. Fuck Yes. Muppets FTW.

19:25: is it just me or is Angelina Jolie not looking super healthy? She looks like a stick figure. Either way, The Descendants just won best-adapted screenplay. I’m sure it’s great but I was really pulling for Moneyball.

19:29: I really hope Woody Allen wins for best original.

19:30: Woody Allen wins. Fucking A. I’d really like to see him win best picture as well but don’t see it happening.

19:37: You know, the technical awards should get more than just a 2-minute recap. But maybe I’m a huge nerd.

19:39: Maya Rudolph and Kristin Wiig making innuendo about short vs long films should be cliche but somehow is just funny.

19:42: Are all the best documentary nominees seated in the nose bleeds? Do they get to give their speech after the next awards when they finally get to the stage?

19:45: That’s a capitol hat the guy who won for best animated short is wearing. Jaunty angle as well.

19:50: Michael Douglas is a clone of Kirk Douglas right? Time for the best director. Thinking that The Artist will likely win. If something I don’t want to win is going to win though, let it be Hugo. If something I want to win wins let it be Midnight in Paris.

19:53: aaaand The Artist wins for best director. Le sigh.

19:57: Governors awards. Again, wish they weren’t given such a brief recap. Just make it part of the show. Or, better yet, replace the red carpet BS with them.

20:00: Only best actor, actress, and film are left. Not hopeful for anyone involved in films that don’t rhyme with "de smartest."

20:03: Time for the in memoriam. Usually, this is when we get to hear how famous people were by how loud the crowd claps, but no one is clapping. Fucking finally.

20:13: ok the show is starting to feel dragged out. But at least Natalie Portman is on stage to give ay the best actor award. I’m sure Rene Dujardin will win, but we’ll see. Nice little unspoken exchange between her and Gary Oldman as she talked about his performance in Tinker Tailor.

20:18: Jean Dujardin wins. Not surprised in the slightest. Don’t get me wrong, while I didn’t think the movie was worth all the awards it’s winning or even like his character? He did a brilliant job. That said, GARY OLDMAN WAS NOMINATED.

20:24: Here’s Colin Firth to give the best actress award. No idea who it will be. Meryl Streep won the BAFTA but that’s British isn’t it. Viola Davis needs to win, Rooney Mara I want to win, but I have a feeling it’ll be Bernice Bejo.

20:29: Oh wait Bernice Bejo wasn’t nominated. Fuck. I had kind of assumed that she was. Either way, Meryl just won and it’s about fucking time. Even if Viola Davis should have. But seriously, about time. 13 nominations between wins?? Too many.

20:32: Tom Cruise to present best picture. With a montage. It’ll be The Artist, but I really want it to be … Well, they’re all good, but Midnight in Paris. Or Moneyball.

20:36: And The Artist wins. Quel surprise. Between Hugo cleaning up the technical awards and The Artist cleaning up everything else it doesn’t seem like anything else won much of anything.

You know, this ceremony wasn’t very exciting. I hope next year there’s some risks, some more varied choices, and that the theme is a little more specific than "we like movies.". I’m going to sleep on it and recap in a day or two with more feelings on who won and who didn’t but long story short: boring, Emma Stone hot, Angelina Jolie not hot, and very few surprises.